Have you ever done a trust fall? That is where you cross your arms in front of your chest, straighten you legs and then tip yourself backwards with someone behind you that will be willing and able to catch your fall. In order for you to do this you have to be willing to trust your partner. If they don't make the catch you could break your back or bust your head open and forget who you are, Charlie. There's a scene in my favorite movie of all time, Mean Girls, where the characters utilize a trust fall. It's dorky I know but so I am sometimes, ha. When picking up women, your partner in the trust fall is the woman you are talking with. You must trust her. That is an order from me, Captain Wayne to you, Sergeant Reader-of-this-article. Women can sense when you don't trust them. They understand that a man who doesn't trust is a wannabe dictator. And as with most dictators he's no fun to be around.
If any of these are you then give me a call and we will talk about setting you on the right path.
* Not adding pauses into your speech. * Stacking routines. * Being overly positive. Afraid of negativity. * Not talking in a personal manner. * Talking too fast. * Relying on witty content. * Forcing numbers. * Asking close-ended or god-forbid, leading questions. * Looking for signs that she likes you. IOI-trash * Other stupid stuff.
These all add up to not getting laid. Wake up and smell the coffee. They are a symptom of YOU not trusting HER. Guys who get laid at pick up (all 50 of them) believe they are secure enough to let women react to them any way they want. They make room for it. Why? Because they trust her to like them. They're not dictators, they're libertarians. They understand that for a woman to value you she must invest in the relationship. Yeah, sometimes she will be mean, sometimes she will be brash, sometimes she will say stupid things or pull your ear hairs out. That doesn't mean she doesn't want to bonk you in the Holiday Inn hot tub.
Ultimately, trusting women means trusting yourself. People are just a mirror for you to bounce yourself off of, you know? You have to trust that you are an interesting, fascinating read. Slow down, learn to better articulate your personality, ask a few open ended questions and have faith that you are being cool despite any concrete evidence.
Does that make sense? If not, its my fault. I'm running around the world blabbering on about using the 'I' perspective but I don't know if I've ever really explained what that means. My bad. What the "I' perspective means is you making a pact to trust yourself to be interesting enough. The rest is just techniques to articulate yourself better and allow her to do the same, oh and escalation theory, gotta have that. Well, I guess I have some more writing to do. See you next time - Wayne Elise