Being charming often comes down to understanding the principles of human interaction. To help us better understand these dynamics, read the following story and comment on where Bob wimps out, uses pansy-speak and plays his cards wrong. Bonus points for spotting goofy techniques. I have placed numbers along the side to enable reference. 01: The Scene: A bar somewhere. Bob approaches a group of women.
02: "Hello ladies," he says. "I can only stay for a minute."
03: "Okay...," the women say.
04: He sticks his hand out. "My name's Bob."
05: The women look at each other. One looks at the floor. Another looks at the ceiling.
06: One one thousand, two one thousand, three one...
07: One of the women sighs and takes his hand, "I'm Sandra. This is everyone."
08: "Nice to meet you."
09: "Sir," a waiter leans in, "What would you like to drink?"
10: "Can I get a Diet Coke?" asks Bob.
11: "Rum in that?" the waiter raises his brow.
12: "No thank you."
13: The waiter holds his fingers apart. "How bout a wee bit?"
14: "Okay fine, a wee bit then." He turns back to the women. "So are you ladies having a good time?"
15: The women look at each other. One looks at the bartender. Another checks out her fingernails.
16: "Yeah, we're having a good time," says Sandra.
17: The other women giggle at that for some reason.
18: Bob leans into her. "So what do you think about this place?"
19: "It's okay, we come here all the time."
20: He nods his head. "I thought so. You're party girls aren't you?"
21: "No, this place is just near where we work."
22: "Okay. Good for you."
23: She knits her brow and turns back to the others.
24: "Your rum and... Diet Coke has arrived," says the waiter setting the drink in front of Bob.
25: Bob checks his watch. "That was fast." He takes a sip.
26: "Yes sir. That will be $57."
27: Bob's gag reflex makes him cough. "A touch expensive, isn't it? Is this Rum from Bob Marley's private collection?"
28: "No sir. I took the liberty of allowing you the privilege of paying for the ladies drinks."
29: Sandra winks at Bob. "Thanks Bob." She calls out, "Cheers to Bob!"
30: The women cheer and toast.
31: "Who's Boob?" asks one woman.
32: "The boob who paid for the drinks," says another.
33: "Thanks Boob."
34: Bob grabs the waiter's sleeve. "Can I not have the privilege of paying for the drinks?"
35: The waiter studies him then answers in a French accent he didn't have a moment ago, "No, I dooonna thinka sooo. Not posseeebuulll."
36: Bob pulls his wallet and hands over his Visa.
37: "Hey Sandra," calls out one of the women. "You're single You should give Bob here your number."
38: All the women laugh at that.
39: Sandra squirms in her seat. "I don't give out my number."
40: The women goad her. "Awe come on." "Give it a whirl." "He's got nice eyes." "Must be loaded."
41: Everyone stares at her.
42: She turns to Bob. "Why don't you give me your number?"
43: All eyes shift to Bob.
44: "I can't give my number out either," says Bob.
45: "Why the hell not Boob?" someone calls out.
46: "I have just promised some people."
47: "You're one of those guys aren't you?" asks a woman.
48: "What guys are those?" asks Bob.
49: "Those guys. Janice what are those guys called? From that book Mike was reading. The one that looks like a Bible?"
50: "The secret lives of pickup artists," says the one called Janice.
51: "That's right. You're a pickup artist."
52: "Do you do this all the time?"
53: "Do what?" asks Bob.
54: "Talk to strange women and try to pick them up."
55: "Is your basement full of whips and sexual devices?" asks another woman.
56: They all laughed except Janice.
57: "No," says Janice. "They just get their numbers and leave 'em high and dry. Its like a game. Right?"
58: Bob looks at her, "Well, if I told you I'd have to kill you."
59: That pops the tension. The women lean back and began talking about other things. "Did you see that sample they brought in today?" "I've to go home and feed the twins." "I have no idea how the company is supposed to market that thing." "Did you see the new guy at the shop?"
60: The waiter is at Bob's shoulder. "Nice try sir but you lost them with that last quip."
61: "I was being mysterious," says Bob.
62: The waiter now has an Australian accent. "No worries mate. Plenty more where they came from." He smiles and pockets the card off of one of the women who mouths, "Call me."
63: Bob touches the arm of Sandra. "How about we swap numbers?" he asks.
64: "Actually I'm seeing someone."
65: "Well you never know. He might die or something."
66: "That's not funny." She turns away.
67: Bob gets up and walks to the door.
68: The women all burst out laughing behind him.
69: Bob finds the valet and asks him to bring his car round.
70: "That was fast," says the valet.
71: "Yeah," responds Bob, "I could only stay for a minute."
Okay so what did Bob do wrong or right or whatever you think? Put your comments in the forum using the numbers on the left for reference. I will post my thoughts later.